I had a hard time yesterday, dealing with things that irritate me, people I dont like, and crying out to God, asking "why?!"
My enemy list has made it to 5. Thats right, folks, I'm hard core! One enemy has never even done anything except opened her mouth. Ohhhhhhh, that was so terrible when I read those words as they typed out of these hands. Can you believe it!? I dislike someone because she talks!!! I feel horrible. She's just so loud and her and her kids scream across the field which includs EVERYONE into her buisness. I just dont want to know her buisness, and yet, maybe if I make it a point to befriend her, I'll feel less aggitated. I'm gonna try. :)
There's a book, Never Give Up, that I'm gonna order this weekend. It talks about dealing with those who have hurt you and allowing God to deal with the situation rather than you, yourself, always responding to it. Ohhhhhhh, I so need this book right now. I still have so much frustration built up to my in-laws over this house, and there are others that just urk me to no end because of pain and insult.
And, now, little Jeremy is frustrated over putting on a shoe. I so wish I had a happy pill to pop into his mouth. He tends to follow in his father's footsteps when it comes to the pouting. OMG, we just had to have a teaching moment on shoes and getting upset.
I so just want to enjoy today. I want to leave work feeling accomplished and happy and come home to a half way cleaned house, make dinner, drink coffee, relax, and get up tomorrow to clean frantically/obessively and then head off to watch my boy play football. My heart is broken, though, that Austin isnt coming home this weekend. I think I'll call him for a Sunday lunch or something. I just wanna hang out with him. :)